Episode 53
‘You can’t be labeled as weak by that bastard.’
It was a problem that Lee Jae-heon’s pride was hurt, but the bigger problem was Detective Hong Gyeong-jun’s tendencies. Detective Hong had a strange sense of humor and sometimes did strange things.
To give an example, he almost imprisoned a kindergarten teacher who was seriously injured and acted as if he were watching over her. Of course, he had no bad intentions at all and was trying to protect himself, but the individual teacher couldn’t help but feel that his freedom was being oppressed.
‘I don’t know about Detective Hong Gyeong-jun himself, but… he has a bit of a control tower-like aspect.’
Even though the purpose was not for his own personal profit but for the public interest of all, it was not a very good look, at least for the main character, Assistant Manager Jeong In-ho. This was especially true when I saw people subtly discriminating against and distrusting people based on their intuition.
What would happen if you were labeled as weak by a guy like that?
‘First of all, you won’t be able to live well.’
“I don’t understand it simply by saying, ‘I think that would be good.’ “It’s almost the first time in my life that someone was injured at the same level as you.”
“…I guess you made your life as a detective very…easy.”
“If you want to think that way, you can. But even if you say such harsh words, you can’t just leave a patient like this alone.”
In addition, the plan I had made so far also went awry.
In fact, he was going to be marked by Detective Hong as a ‘strong but would-be murderer who hasn’t committed anything yet’. It seemed like a bit of nonsense and a scary concept, but there is no such thing as pride in survival.
If the concept worked properly, numerous benefits could be gained. By primarily creating intensity, Lee Jae-heon will receive caution from Detective Hong, and this caution will relieve the protagonist’s mental health, which would otherwise be stressed by his relationship with the detective.
“I also have company. Why should I follow someone I don’t know very well? “Aren’t you forcing beliefs that are too unrealistic in the current situation?”
“I don’t know if the people in that group can be trusted. Are they as injured as you? “I don’t think so.”
“The leap is too… severe. Are you criticizing my group based solely on your intuition?”
“It’s not a criticism, it’s an objective judgment. “As expected, except for the teacher, the rest of the group seems to be in good condition, judging by their reactions.”
“What the heck…”
The main character probably lost a little hair because he was under the detective’s unreasonable suspicion, just like in the novel before his return. Looking at Detective Hong, who seemed to have a complete misunderstanding, I could indirectly feel his frustration.
‘Anyway, if that happens, secondarily… it will neutralize the image that has built up on that guy.’
I happened to get the title of being a sacrificial and good adult, but even if it was inevitable that he led me to become a good adult, there was a problem with the ‘sacrificial’ part. In this way, his image, which had soared through the sky so absurdly, could be brought down safely through the detective’s guard.
Above all, if this happens, Jaeheon Lee’s activities will become a little more free.
‘Because it’s exactly neutral.’
What he wants is ‘a strong person who hasn’t done anything in particular and doesn’t look like the serial killer they’re looking for. He actually seems more dangerous than him, but in the end, he didn’t do anything.’
“It seems like you made a sacrifice of your own volition, but from a detective’s perspective, it doesn’t look very good. In this case, is it okay for me to judge you as mentally and physically weak?”
“I’m not an alcoholic, I’m not that old, I’m not autistic or intellectually disabled. “Weakness of mind and body is a word that only comes up in court, but it is extremely unpleasant to make your own judgment without any evidence.”
In this case, since there is no justification, the detective cannot oppress him, nor can he not be on guard. From the perspective of a detective with very good intuition, Lee Jae-heon would not receive his characteristic overprotection since he would be branded as a potential criminal who would commit crimes someday, and on the other hand, he could freely show off to his heart’s content.
Look, how much of Lee Jae-heon’s freedom was suppressed even before he fell asleep. In a situation like this where he couldn’t walk freely or drink water, the detective’s vigilance would be a great help in the future protagonist training plan.
‘But… this causes some problems.’
Jaeheon Lee subconsciously bit his lip.
“You know quite a bit. It seems like you have studied law or looked into it separately. If so, what about mental disorders? “I wonder if you consider yourself normal.”
“…It makes me sound like I’m crazy. “I don’t feel like cooperating any more.”
“…Are you not denying it?”
“What on earth are you asking me to do? “I’m already so tired that I’m going to die.”
“You look nervous. It seems like you sneaked out without telling the group. Why didn’t you inform them of your condition? Does this mean that you are not a trustworthy partner?”
“I believe it, I believe it. “You’ve been criticizing and judging my group arbitrarily since a while ago, and that looks really bad.”
Although Hong Gyeong-jun has a bit of a creepy side, he is still a character who pursues good like the main character. He was even a police officer with a strong sense of professional calling, so there was no way he would just ignore Lee Jae-heon in his dying state.
Nevertheless, the thought that kept coming back to him, ‘I have to make sure that bastard doesn’t recognize me as a weakling’, took a moment to dry his face, and then opened his mouth.
“…I really appreciate you trying to help me, but… I can handle it on my own.”
Of course, that did not mean that the other party would simply back down.
“Hemoptysis is a serious symptom. “I don’t know if you have a chronic illness or if you have damage to your bronchial tubes or lungs, but I don’t think we can resolve either case on your own.”
“I said that I don’t want to receive help from people I’ve never met… so I just turned it around.”
“It’s not like I didn’t understand. “But isn’t it disrespectful of my pride as a police officer to ask you to leave a critically ill patient alone in these dark times?”
“Huh.”
Jaeheon Lee sighed briefly.
He may have said something about his pride or his dismissive remarks, but the truth is that Detective Hong probably didn’t actually think that way. However, I only tried to make him feel guilty or intimidated because Lee Jae-heon, who seemed to be in urgent need of treatment, was unlikely to submit to him obediently.
The inner pain that I have experienced for the first time in a very long time and the mental headache that went away as a result. A troubling annoyance with my lucid dreams. A character I met out of nowhere and myself for which I was completely unprepared. Lee Jae-heon couldn’t control himself properly due to the other trivial yet annoying elements.
In the end, he spoke instinctively without even being able to organize his thoughts.
“…Detective, you’re very rambunctious. You must both be tired, but you are on your way, right? “Do you want to do something like someone else’s?”
“It seems like you are speaking harshly on purpose. Is it because you want me to leave? “Excuse me, I can’t do that.”
Even if you encourage people to avoid it, it doesn’t work.
“huh…? Really, why would you do that? They say they don’t need me. They say it’s so hard it’s driving me crazy. Was it such a difficult request to just go somewhere out of my sight?”
“You are good at changing facial expressions.”
Even if I pretended to beg, it didn’t work…
“No, really…”
I felt sad at this point.
‘Everyone is like, what the fuck did I do so wrong?’
Apart from the fact that my current personality remained intact, even the primal fear of being in a remote place came to me. It was because the world of my previous life and the common sense here were so different.
To be honest, Jaeheon Lee has been under a lot of stress so far. I was so sad that I had to play this goddamn survival game again in a different world that I was literally on the verge of death and couldn’t rest. I even had to worry about it the whole time, fighting with the disgusting chicks. For Lee Jae-heon, whose previous life itself was a trauma, there could be no world more painful than this.
He was an adult with the right to assert himself and a democratic citizen who should be free. I was going to take care of my own body, but it was crazy to have everyone criticizing me, and my common sense was so different from the world of my previous life that I felt like I was being treated like a crazy person for just one word.
And at this point, Jaeheon Lee changed his mind.
‘I will inevitably destroy it all someday.’
It was all the fault of the chicks around me that I was sad, tired, and tired right now.
Let’s split everyone except me. If you can figure out a certain course, you will definitely do something troll and break your mentality. Very finely, as delicately as dust, in a meticulous and serious manner. I was going to pay for all the physical and mental pain I had suffered so far, and I was going to lose my money like a loan shark.
Thinking like that, my mind instantly became organized, my cool returned, and my mind became clear. As expected, blaming others seemed to be the best way to manage one’s mental state.
Lee Jae-heon, who regained his pace, continued speaking in no time.
“…Well, it’s true that I need help.”
“….”
“The timing is really bad.”
As he said that, he naturally erased the expression on his face.
“It would have been great if you had just gone.”
I felt the other person startled by the sudden change in tone of voice and expression.
Detective Hong Gyeong-jun, who had a keener intuition than anyone else about this extreme change like that of a person with a dual personality, would have felt a strange chill by now. In the first place, Lee Jae-heon, who recalled his past life, was a huge mental patient that we had to be wary of.
‘Honestly, it’s a strangely finite reaction for something like that, but…’
Lee Jae-heon managed his expression even though he felt a slight sense of discomfort. I was curious as to why the other person didn’t show as much vigilance as expected, but the priority was to get that troublesome entity out of sight.
He opened his mouth, feeling the weight of the air change.
“I don’t think you’ll be traveling alone.”
“…I also have company. “I tried to take the teacher there.”
“Ah, group.”
Lee Jae-heon, who deliberately spoke, tilted his head. It was never a relationship I made to use in times like this, but I had no choice but to get out of this tiring situation safely.
He continued speaking in a steady tone.
“Because you’re a police officer… I guess you’re Constable Kim Yeon-woo?”
“….”
Detective Hong Gyeong-jun was taken aback for a moment, but quickly erased his confusion. There was a high probability that he had heard about Lee Jae-heon from Police Officer Kim, whom he had already met.
“By any chance, Jaeheon Lee…?”
“It’s me.”
“…My group received help in the morning. “I would like to thank you.”
“I should be thankful for that too. “Please tell me that you are grateful for saving my life.”
“….”
Detective Hong Gyeong-jun asked.
“…haven’t you ever heard that it’s like having a double personality?”
“I’ve heard it a few times.”
“Your impression is so different from before. “I’m sorry if this was an impolite question.”
“There’s nothing to be sorry about.”
Lee Jae-heon spoke with an expressionless face, wiping the blood from the corner of his mouth with his hand.
“No matter if I do this or that, it doesn’t work… so there’s nothing I can do.”
“….”
“Are you listening? I am okay.”
Laugh lightly.
“I’m not saying my physical condition is fine, but I’m fine because everything is the way I want.”
Jaeheon Lee revised his plan.
No matter how much the opponent was a fool who went beyond common sense, Detective Hong Gyeong-jun was a good person. Showing your body in such tatters and hemoptysis in front of such a person means that you have gone too far in not being treated like a weakling.
So Jaeheon Lee had no choice but to change his route.
‘If you try to create a strong atmosphere while you are already showing weakness, it will only create a funny sense of discomfort and will not achieve the desired effect.’
However, in the worst case, he becomes extremely sensitive and shows excessive behavior, but it only seems easy to be suppressed. In the end, in order to reap the minimum benefit, one must become ‘a person who is weak but does not need to be protected’, and Jaeheon Lee was able to quickly find a different concept.
‘A mentally ill person whose thinking has been distorted by the underworld.’
It was the first personality he created after recalling his past life, and it was a good choice as it was a concept he had already used once before with the main character and the doctor. In this case, sympathy was inevitable, but Lee Jae-heon was able to get what he wanted.
First of all, it is possible to maintain some of the intensity required in the existing plan. Basically, no matter how you look at a communicable mental patient, there is an unpleasant aspect to it, so Lee Jae-heon, who was not surprised at any unexpected behavior, would have been cautioned by detectives.
But that doesn’t mean he can’t be oppressed like the kindergarten teacher in the story. Once again, he was a psychopath. Even if it makes sense, there is always a risk. There was no way that Detective Hong Gyeong-jun, who had experienced numerous criminal cases and had seen various mentally ill people, would do such a foolish thing as oppressing and provoking Lee Jae-heon like that.
“…I’m sorry, but I don’t understand. “Are you really Jaeheon Lee?”
“I don’t know how many more times I have to say it, but yes, that’s right. Because I don’t have a dual personality. However, I am not a monster pretending to be ‘Lee Jae-heon.’”
“….”
“I have never changed, Detective.”
Nevertheless, Lee Jae-heon was a very useful talent, even if he could not show it right now.
Even his lack of concern for his own well-being might have made him think that he could be used as a labor force in the future. Of course, if it gets too bad, Lee Jae-heon will beat the returner without even looking back.
Moreover, it is not inherently bad. The reason he became like this was because he was instilled with wrong common sense from the underworld, but in any case, Lee Jae-heon’s nature of not knowing what’s wrong can’t be seen as that bad. The persuasive power was sufficient because of the good deeds that had been accumulated so far to avoid going beyond the limit. Detective Hong may be hesitant now, but he will do it later when the situation is resolved.
Jaeheon Lee thought to himself.
‘Of course, this is not without its problems.’
The reason I didn’t try to use this concept from the beginning was because of the problem of not being able to quickly defeat the opponent.
Lee Jae-heon is a mentally ill person who can communicate well, and if they can communicate, a basic relationship will be formed, so the natural progression will be for the detective to wonder why he is like this. However, if you ask yourself, you probably won’t get an answer, so maybe you should ask someone else who knows the reason. In this case, it was a structure in which the main character or the doctor, who knew a little bit about Lee Jae-heon’s past history, had no choice but to become entangled with the detective in front of him.
If that happens, it becomes difficult for Lee Jae-heon to deal with Detective Hong with ease. No matter how many bad relationships he had before returning, the protagonist is ultimately the protagonist. There are very few people who know the past history of Lee Jae-heon, a person of interest, so if Detective Hong finds out about him… there is a
high possibility that he too will become one of the ‘main characters’.
‘Then naturally, we will have to take care of other survivors as well.’
“When you say you’ve never changed… is it okay to interpret it as intentional?”
“What?”
“To be honest, I don’t think they are the same person. But since you say this is all about you… you must have made it up, right? That expression and tone of voice…”
“….”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t give a proper explanation either. “This is my first time in a situation like this.”
Detective Hong is the leader of the other survivor teams.
If such a guy somehow fell into the category of protagonist, even if only superficially, Jaeheon Lee couldn’t let anyone die in order to maintain the status quo of the group. At least that’s what I’m thinking about right now.
“…I understand.”
But in the underworld, death is a great loss.
‘It is true that the stronger the trauma of the survivor, the better the situation, but that also has to take into account the situation.’
In the same way that Lee Jae-heon couldn’t hear the wind blowing from the spider monster at work, people who are mentally ill from the beginning have an easier time adapting to the underworld. Just as if you draw a black apple on black paper, it won’t be visible.
In this hidden world, thoughts are an important keyword. The more negative thoughts you have, the more things you can do. If you were in a state where you could take advantage of that, the group was all chicks. If we were to compare it realistically, it would be drug abuse. If you use it properly, it can be a medicine, but if you use it too much and don’t know how to use it, it can be poison.
Of course, it doesn’t really help one-sidedly like a drug, but rather an equivalent exchange of physical comfort and mental comfort…
‘Honestly, I don’t know if it’s an equivalent price.’
“…I didn’t want to seem like a crazy person.”
“….”
“It always happens like this.”
In any case, the concept that ordinary people regard as the most extreme is death, and since this too is being marginalized, a big change will occur. Taking that into account, Lee Jae-heon has taken measures to ensure that no one in the group dies, but as the scope of the group expands, it also means that there will be more people that Lee Jae-heon will have to save.
It was annoying, and on the other hand, I wanted to kill him out of anger, so I tried to just end the relationship with a straight face…
“…So, it’s whatever you want. “Everything?”
“I don’t know how it will look, but it’s a pretty good situation.”
Unless you erase the other person’s memories, you won’t be able to change their perception of you as the underdog, so Lee Jae-heon couldn’t just push forward with his initial concept. Something was needed that could overcome the penalty of being the ‘weak’.
His greatest strength was that he was quick to give up and resign.
“I haven’t achieved everything I wanted to do, but at least I don’t think it’s that bad right now.”
“Why…”
In order to get even the slightest benefit, he had to quickly scrap the first plan and come up with a new concept that would at least achieve what he wanted. And Lee Jae-heon was also quite talented at acting.
He put the very first personality he created on his face.
“well.”
“….”
“Do we need to talk?”
Tired and mechanical.
I laughed like that.
