If you don’t debut, you get a fatal disease Episode 477
“….”
Cha Yu-jin inhaled slowly.
The fresh and thrilling smell unique to the beach where the rough waves hit the shoreline reached my lungs.
Even though it is summer, the dawn near the water is moderately tolerably hot. So, the beach on Ganghwa Island was the air that reminded him of the beach in San Diego where he was.
In the past, it was easy to get back on track at times like this.
But now his head is not clear.
To put it precisely, now Cha Yu-jin could not blow away the ‘feeling of a loser’ as easily as shaking off dust.
It was no longer possible like before.
‘It’s like shit.’
So he decided to at least calm down.
I thought I could do at least keep my mouth shut here and endure for 30 days….
if no one
But
“Cha Yoo-jin!”
“…!”
I heard a call
When I turned my head, I saw a gloomy figure wearing a mask.
I didn’t mean dark.
Because they are running with the sunset at their back, they look dim because of the light.
And he could tell who it was just from that dark silhouette.
‘Cause I’ve seen you for years
-…bye. Yoojin Cha.
The last colleague I said goodbye to on the way home.
“Kim Raebin.”
But the moment the name came out of my mouth, I realized.
‘It’s not the same person.’
My stomach became uncomfortable.
In the meantime, ‘Kim Rae-bin’ – after all, the name is the same! – ran to the beach and shouted.
“Were you really here?!”
to find yourself
Does ‘here’s Yujin Cha’ have any special memories of this place?
The thought of it made me very sick.
“I am here. But aren’t you looking for your friend?”
“…??”
“Then go back. Because there doesn’t seem to be anyone like that. I am not your friend.”
The words couldn’t come out so smoothly. Cha Yu-jin did not dare to express her anger, and silently turned her head.
It was then.
“no! You are my friend.”
“…!”
Kim Rae-bin also raised his voice.
But Cha Yoo-jin knew.
‘He’s not angry.’
Raebin Kim’s voice was firmly embedded in the confidence and certainty unique to a person who just shared what he found out.
“Since participating in < Azusa >, I agree that the time we experienced is different. But I realized that the friendship we had built before the event hadn’t gone away.”
‘Before the participation?’
Cha Yoo-jin inadvertently asked himself inwardly and immediately realized.
Before participating in < Azusa >.
The days when we practiced together at the same agency.
“Then I am the friend you met during your trainee days. You are also Cha Yoo-jin, who I studied with when I was a trainee!”
“….”
“That can determine that we are the same person!”
Cha Yu-jin was at a loss for words for a moment.
It wasn’t that I didn’t have anything to refute.
but…It was because the opponent was full of confidence in Kim Rae-bin. He seemed to believe without a doubt that he had found the perfect logic.
‘oh my god.’
And that… It’s not something you’ve easily seen in the past few years.
But it wasn’t completely unfamiliar either.
Several times before debut and even after debut… when preparing an album.
-If you proceed like this, you will definitely have a stage that conveys modern charm and has a high degree of perfection.
I remember seeing something like that from time to time.
…no that’s not it
‘My friend was originally like that.’
Kim Rae-bin was originally such a person.
At first glance, he seems polite and humble, but he is stubborn and does not yield.
self-confidence.
A worldview that is so blatantly firm.
And to make it unpretentious… Talent.
Seeing the good side of an old colleague again made me feel extraordinary.
“….”
Obviously, Cha Yoo-jin knew.
‘It’s not the same person.’
I even told myself several times that it was someone other than the person I knew.
Still, this was unavoidable.
‘…But there are commonalities.’
Cha Yoo-jin was only in her 20s.
I couldn’t deny the certain friendship that was proved in the dead end corner of a strange world where I was suddenly stuck.
So he had no choice but to answer in a hushed voice.
[You’re right.]
It was the first recognition.
Just in time, a wave hit. Cha Yu-jin turned her head.
‘I bet he didn’t understand.’
However, a bigger answer came back without having to answer again in Korean.
“okay!”
hmm?
Cha Yoo-jin rose from the rock.
“Did you understand Kim Rabin?”
“I am studying simple English at the word level for writing lyrics. Because it helps to hit the punchline.”
“Oh.”
Cha Yoo-jin almost asked what kind of song he was composing at the moment, but soon realized the reality and stopped.
because it doesn’t make any sense
“…?”
Kim Rae-bin did not notice the unnatural break, but decided to continue the conversation as he had decided.
Taking advantage of the slightly relaxed atmosphere, he recalled Moondae Park’s advice.
-If you really meet Yujin Cha… feel free to say whatever you want
So I really did.
Kim Rae-bin first asked the most important thing in his judgment.
“Have you eaten?”
Food, clothing and shelter!
I couldn’t sleep, so it was right to bring a meal.
Cha Yoo-jin was taken aback for a moment, but soon smiled and turned her gaze back to the sea.
“no.”
“Then it’s early, but let’s start with breakfast.”
“are you okay.”
It wasn’t ‘in the mood’.
Then Kim Rae-bin looked at him with a shocked expression.
“Are you stressed enough to skip meals?”
“….”
“…! Or are you feeling a lot of pressure from your current situation because you lived so freely?”
his freedom.
Cha Yoo-jin stared at the waves with her chin resting on her chin, and answered without thinking.
“I worked at a garage.”
“….”
The 5 years of activity ended as if nothing had happened. What he started doing after returning home like that.
“My parents said they would give me a surfboard shop, but I said no.”
It must have been more irritating to meet and chat with nerds who flirted with surfboards on the beach every day.
I wanted to be stuck in a pathetic life wasting my life, but it was a contradictory feeling that I didn’t want to meet an idiot who wasted my life.
“A garage?”
“huh.”
“It was fun?”
“not really.”
But I didn’t hate it that much. Cha Yoo-jin had no history of not being able to do anything. He quickly adapted to using his hands and body at the garage.
and….
“It was nice not to think about anything.”
“….”
Why did Steer Cha Yoo-jin return to Korea as soon as his contract ended?
In fact, it wasn’t that he didn’t receive offers from other agencies at all.
It wasn’t a great agency, but some suggestions came from small agencies.
Maybe I could have released one or two more albums.
But he didn’t.
-No.
‘I’ve already come too far.’
Because he realized he had done something stupid.
“….”
Originally, he had a very simple theory of life that he had learned and developed from his grandfather.
– Find a solution if you don’t see it.
-If you can’t find it, give up cleanly and try in a new direction.
Cha Yoo-jin thought and lived like that. until debut.
However, the past few years as ‘Steer’s Cha Yu-jin’ were a bit different.
It’s because I couldn’t ‘give up cleanly’.
‘A member is arrested for drugs, a song they did not choose becomes the title, a project they did not participate in gets the group’s name, and the album is canceled… ….’
and rumors.
Rumors and rumors and untouchable circumstances.
Although he couldn’t see any fundamental solution, he persevered by making the best choice every moment.
Of course, at the time, it all felt worthwhile. Even if it was a waste, it didn’t matter.
But after pouring everything in like that.
As a result, there was nothing left.
– Termination of the steer contract.
“….”
An ending in which neither growth nor reversal occurred.
If you’ve come this far, you have to admit it.
That the time to give up has passed.
“But this makes me think too much.”
so painful
The world where the price of a stupid choice that doesn’t give up was given outrageously was too perfect.
Everyone is happy and everything is successful.
[I’m just…I don’t know why I have to see this damn world where everything is perfect.]
“….”
It was a word that he couldn’t even say in English, so Cha Yoo-jin muttered in Spanish.
However, Kim Rae-bin did not insist on what he was saying.
I just silently tried to figure out the feelings contained in the tone, even with my own sociality that was not sensitive.
‘It seems difficult.’
And that core was enough.
So, Kim Rae-bin decided to sit quietly next to Cha Yoo-jin and watch the sea together.
It was because he knew that he was speechless.
“….”
“….”
And it was the right choice.
Shootah Ah-
The waves were reflected by the light and slightly waved.
In front of the peaceful beach, Cha Yoo-jin felt a bit of liberation.
It was the kind of thing that could be enjoyed by uttering words that no one would understand.
Thanks to that, I was able to nod my head at Kim Rae-bin’s words.
“It’s eight o’clock now, a good time for breakfast.”
“okay.”
The two arose from a rock by the sea.
The footprints were not crooked and remained neat.
* * *
And after having breakfast at a white house with a solitary room that Kim Rae-bin had known to the members in advance.
Kim Rae-bin now asked his own questions comfortably.
“Cha Yujin, do you hate the hyungs?”
“Kheup”
Yes.
just frankly
Cha Yoo-jin, who had been drinking water, almost felt sick, but managed to hold it in.
And thinking that it was the yard where the dorm came out anyway, he decided to give an honest answer.
“uncomfortable.”
“Because you feel that you are trying to infringe on your freedom for another Cha Yu-jin? Or because he treats you while projecting Cha Yu-jin?”
“Umm… that’s right.”
Cha Yoo-jin reacted with a shudder. It was because Kim Rae-bin spoke so blatantly.
And after thinking about it, I came up with a more honest and specific answer.
Sorry for the favor. and…It was because of some worries.
“and…‘Mundae hyung’?”
hmm?
Kim Rae-bin raised his head.
Cha Yujin frowned mysteriously.
“I think that person is suspicious.”
“…!”
“He knows me too well.”
Kim Rae-bin opened his mouth wide.
“that…Moondae hyung remembers all of us well, but since he is in charge of planning this group… .”
“Nope! It doesn’t mean that. It’s about me.”
“…?”
“Me, not you.”
Cha Yoo-jin pointed at herself.
He was already feeling it.
The person Kim Rae-bin calls ‘Moon Dae-hyung’ knows too well about Steer Cha Yu-jin.
Steer is a group whose words objectively weren’t that good.
‘It was even a boy band.’
It’s hard for a man of the same sex to know the circumstances so well. Hearing the name even once would be the limit. That’s only for bad rumors.
But what was the attitude of a person named Park Moon-dae?
-shut up.
-…It’s okay if you don’t have to look at it.
Block at every crucial moment.
Just like knowing exactly what triggers your group has.
Also based on facts.
“Too much so…It’s not natural.”
“….”
Cha Yoo-jin couldn’t explain it to Kim Rae-bin in detail, but he wanted to warn him that he was somewhat uncomfortable.
So said.
but.
“Then let’s ask them directly!”
“What?”
Kim Rae-bin picked up his smartphone right away… !
“Are you crazy Kim Raebin?”
“I’m not crazy, you idiot!”
“bar….”
The moment Cha Yu-jin was embarrassed by the Korean swearing he heard after a long time, Kim Rae-bin succeeded in making a phone call.
“Yes brother!”
and after a while
“….”
“….”
One more person was added to the room at the white house on the beach of Ganghwa Island, which is still empty.
“hi.”
‘Mundae-hyung’ got puffy eyes in one day.
He didn’t have a healthy complexion or a ferocious expression, but his face looked even more tired and troubled.
‘hmm….’
Cha Yu-jin felt a little guilty, but he knew that caution came first.
So I tried to straighten my posture right away, but
“My older brother Cha Yoo-jin says he has a question for him!”
Kim Rae-bin first poured out the questions Cha Yu-jin had to Park Moon-dae.
‘Kim Rae-bin!’
The moment when Cha Yoo-jin shouted inwardly, making eye contact and sharpening her reflexes in preparation for an unexpected situation.
‘Mundae hyung’ in front of me… I bowed my head slightly.
“Um, that.”
And Cha Yoo-jin, who is astute about interpersonal relationships, immediately noticed the nuance of that movement.
this person….
“I am interested.”
“…??”
“I was interested in it, so I just watched the activities.”
This person was embarrassed.
‘oh my god.’
Moondae Park.
Former Ryu Gun-woo ended up ducking out in front of the singer himself at a timing he could not have imagined.
