◈ 409. [Side Story] The other side of the other side (2)
I was so flustered that I couldn’t speak for a while.
Is this woman hanging from a thorn tree the ‘goddess’?
“Then you… Are you saying that you are the guardian deity of mankind?”
“Not all of humanity follows me, but from a racial point of view it is.”
Was it New Year’s Day before? I remembered the story I heard from Ader.
– In this world, beings representing one race are given a chance to obtain a godhood.
At that time, one of the three cases in which Ader explains the godhood is obtained.
1. In the case of the progenitor of the tribe.
2. In the case of a great person who saved the race from danger.
3. Finally, all of your people die, leaving only one member of your race in the world.
Among them, the goddess said that it was the second case. In other words, she made a great achievement of saving humanity from crisis.
But why
Why is it that a being who has achieved such great achievements and even gained divine status is clinging to such a cruel figure… … Are you bleeding and burning?
“I am paying the price now.”
The goddess said calmly.
“In exchange for bringing fire to mankind. And at the cost of sustaining that fire. I decided to punish myself by burning myself forever.”
“What is that… .”
“If you talk about me, staying away for days and days won’t be enough, Ash.”
The goddess smiled kindly at me.
“There will be another opportunity someday… What is more urgent now seems like the problem you have.”
“… .”
“My child, what troubles you?”
I didn’t answer easily, but she seemed to already know everything.
“The fact that a living person has drifted here to the spirit world means that he has no confidence in himself after all.”
“… .”
I remembered the first time I fell to the spirit world.
It rolled down here with the system alarm [Proof of Existence Failed].
From then until now, I have been questioning my own identity.
“ash. All the hardships and adversity you’ve been through, I’ve been watching you from here. I know you doubt your own existence.”
Hearing the voice of the goddess, I clenched my fists tightly.
This series of fights made my flag clear.
Once again I will fight for people. And my will to raise that flag is also clear.
But ‘I’… … .
The more information you gather, the more you get confused, not certainty.
‘Who am I?’
Are you a player? Are you a tyrant? is it a monster
is it ash Is it after the classics?
I am… Something?
“It is not your birth or your ethnicity that defines who you are.”
Then the goddess quietly whispered.
“It’s about what you think and what you do.”
I looked at the goddess with a slightly surprised face.
“that… .”
“Do you remember? That’s what you said.”
The goddess laughed mischievously.
“That was what you said to your people who are wondering whether they are human or monster. ‘If you want to be human, then you must be human.’”
Was it during stage 10?
That’s what I said to Kuylan and the punishment unit, who were contemplating their half-human, half-beast identity.
“Did you tell me? I’ve been watching the fight you’ve been fighting. If I had to put it this way, I’d say I’m a regular listener of your strategy broadcast… … ?”
“… .”
I felt ashamed because I felt like I was actually showing my mother the broadcast. Don’t look at that, Goddess… … .
The goddess who looked down at me as if she was cute continued her words.
“ash. I want to give you your words back. What matters is not where you come from. What do you want to do in the future?”
“… .”
“And it seems to me that the flag of your heart is already strong.”
The goddess smiled brightly.
“Wouldn’t that be enough?”
After keeping my mouth shut and being silent, I raised my head and faced the goddess.
“Only one thing… I want to ask.”
“I will be happy to answer.”
“What was the goddess’ flag?”
What was the ideal she pursued?
Is it possible to remain so aloof while undergoing such a terrible punishment?
She answered my question immediately.
“To make more people happy.”
“Don’t you regret taking that flag?”
Being impaled by thorns, blood poured out from all over the body, and at the same time, the blood turned into flames and the whole body burned.
Too shabby to be a ‘goddess’, she was imprisoned in a corner of this remote world.
If this is the end of her cause, isn’t it too cruel?
“Regret… .”
The goddess smiled bitterly and looked down at her body.
“After enduring this pain forever, I sometimes think about that. If I could go back to that moment of choice, if I could live a normal human life and die instead of accomplishing great feats to gain divine status. What shall I choose?”
she didn’t hesitate
“okay. I can say for sure. If given the chance to choose again and again, I would make the same choice.”
“… !”
“I hesitate, agonize, and maybe give up a few times. In the end, I will steal fire and give people light and warmth.”
The goddess made eye contact with me and quietly whispered.
“So is the long and rough road you have to walk.”
“… .”
“Your flag has already been broken once. But you raised that flag again. Don’t be ashamed of that reversal. Be proud of your wounds.”
“… .”
“Even if it breaks, breaks, breaks… If you don’t give up and go forward and finally stick to your destination and fly, your flag will still be beautiful.”
The goddess, my senior as a flag bearer, nodded softly.
“It’s about time. Go now, my descendant.”
After that, she blew a wink naturally.
“If I had free arms, I would have hugged her once, but unfortunately, I am in this situation. Even with my heart, I wish you blessings on your future.”
It was literally [Goddess Blessing].
Goddess wink. Isn’t it rare?
I politely showed her an example.
“Someday again… I’ll come see you Goddess.”
“I’ll be happy to wait.”
Was it holding back to talk to me?
As the amount of blood pouring from her body increased, so did the flames. In the swirling flames, the goddess was laughing until the very end.
“I hope we can talk more then.”
The heat intensified. I was no longer in that space and had to come out.
“… .”
On the distant beach, the Emperor and the gods are still fighting, creating splashes of water.
At the tip of a thorn tree right in front of you, the goddess is tied up and engulfed in eternal fire.
The scenery of a place called the spirit world is just that you can’t adapt to it. Even if it’s the same fantasy world, it feels like the genre has changed… … .
“What’s coming next… … .”
Let’s mutter and look up at the sky.
Something was falling at a terrifying speed along the stem of the Everblack tree that was extending from the sky.
I narrowed my eyes. That… … ?
“Yeong-joo niii!”
Bangle glasses that cannot be seen through the tangled gray hair.
The goddamn director of this goddamn game and my aide.
It was Ader’s baby.
Cookie light!
Ader, who had fallen without wings, landed on the sandy bottom.
I thought he might have died of a broken neck, but Ader jumped up from his seat, carelessly shaking off the sand. Are you a real monster?
“Wow! He is the real lord!”
“… So, is it fake?”
Ader took my hand and started to do a round dance.
“Lord! our lord! You are alive!”
“I almost died a few times, but come on. He is alive.”
“You suddenly went missing! The system is dead! I thought you died without moving, huh?!”
Ader clung to me with tears in his eyes.
“I thought it was game over for the last episode, and this idiot director really got his ass lined up!”
“Get away, I’m not happy about hugging a guy… .”
When I pushed it lightly, Ader, who was rolling on the sandy floor, smiled wryly.
“You don’t know how much I’ve been wandering around this spirit world since the lord disappeared. Come on, let’s get back to reality! Everyone at Crossroads is waiting with thirst!”
I stretched out my hand to stop Ader, who was preparing to return to reality.
“Ader. for a moment.”
“yes?”
“I have something to ask.”
“Let’s go back to reality first! If you are exposed to the spirit world for a long time, it will have a lot of adverse effects on the already precarious lord’s soul condition… … .”
“Ader!”
When I called out loud, Ader turned to me in surprise. I glared at Ader fiercely.
“We need to talk now.”
“… Lord?”
“I still can’t access the system. It still means that I am failing to prove my existence.”
Breathe in and then inhale.
Looking straight at the culprit behind all this, I asked again and again.
“Who am I?”
“What are you talking about? You know yourself well… .”
“Don’t dodge, answer straight. Who am I?”
It was weird from the start.
This spirit world is the space between life and death. It exists as a spirit body, not as a physical body.
In other words, my appearance will take on the shape of my soul.
And now I’m not a fan of the classics… … She looks like Ash.
said the emperor. I must be his son Ash.
As a transcendental being who fights different gods, he can’t see it wrong as he has gone far beyond the standard of a soul and entered the realm of a half-god.
Why did I dream of Ash’s dream, Ash’s mother’s dream, rather than the dream of a classical virtuoso?
If I’m a classics virtuoso possessed by Ash’s body, I should only have memories as a classics virtuoso. But in reality it was not.
I often read Ash’s memories in my dreams.
– are you okay. My lovely Bonheter.
I remember the face of a woman stroking my forehead.
this will never be my… … It is the memory of ‘Ash’, not the memory of a ‘classics virtuoso’.
And most crucially.
“During this crash, I fought alongside the dreamer corps commander, Salome. And by chance… … That succubus read my memories down to the bottom of my soul.”
Ader’s shoulders trembled.
I took one step closer to Ader.
“Salome, who read my soul, told me. There is a secret in my soul.”
“… Lord.”
“Actually, I’m not a ‘classics fan’ possessed by Ash’s body… … .”
Hard to believe for me.
But the secret that Salome gave to me at the last moment was this.
“… It’s ‘Ash’ who believes himself to be a classics fan.”
This was it.
Even at this moment when I spit it out myself, I am very confused.
What kind of nonsense is this?
“Tell me exactly, Ader.”
I asked the person who knew the answer in a trembling voice.
“I am… Who exactly are you?”
“… .”
“What the hell am I?”
Ader, who was silent for a long time, looked at me blankly,
then slowly… I opened my mouth.
“You are Ash.”
In a bitter, pitiful voice.
“Every round, borrowing other players’ memories and consciousness, or ‘save data’, and overlaying them on top of yours… … .”
I opened my eyes.
“… It’s the ‘save slot’ for this game.”
