If I can’t debut, I’ll get a fatal disease Episode 223
It’s as quiet as a dead mouse in the car.
No, sometimes I could only hear Raebin Kim whimper.
Even those who would normally have comforted me by saying something like, “You’ll be fine,” drove silently or patted me on the back.
Because comfort was more anxious.
“Your brother. …Yes, you should come ‘this morning’. We are on the move right now, so please wait nearby as soon as possible.”
After talking to the manager who was barely connected, I hung up the phone.
Now ‘this dawn?’ Are you going to say the same thing? You have a moment to claim your work-life balance, you crazy bastard.
“….”
What are you doing after that?
I couldn’t do anything like X.
And then I’m just thinking.
From here to Gangwon-do, where Kim Rae-bin’s birthplace is located, it would take more than three hours no matter what he did.
‘In case of emergency, it may be late.’
…But let’s imagine what it would have been like if we had started straight from Seoul, as we usually do right before our vacation.
That time would have been shortened by more than an hour and a half.
difference of an hour and a half.
that calculation… I can’t help but do it.
‘X feet.’
Because the guy sitting in front of me will be thinking the same thing.
Kim Rae-bin is still unable to let go of his smartphone. Unconsciously, he is afraid of waiting for another call to come.
At the same time, he couldn’t bear to call back first… .
“….”
out of breath
‘stop.’
It was funny. I’m not the person involved, and I’m not in a situation where I can help, but I’ve been immersed in myself for no reason.
I laughed at myself, put my head against the window, and decided to keep my mouth shut.
It didn’t seem to bother me at all.
After about three hours of fainting in the car.
I had just passed the final highway toll gate to my destination. Ryu Cheng-wu opened his mouth in the most calm tone.
“I’ll be there in thirty minutes.”
“….”
Bae Se-jin struggled to talk to Kim Rae-bin.
“…Change your clothes.”
“….”
Kim Rae-bin, who had been stiff from tension and worry for too long, slowly began to change his top.
The clothes, which were already about to dry, fell under the sheets and the salt content dropped.
And Kim Rae-bin, who was wearing new clothes, stopped moving as if he was crazy, and soon began to shed tears.
“I am…Because he asked me to go to MT… …late.”
“no.”
I answered involuntarily. without thinking.
So, in fact, I had to come up with a plausible reason from now on, but there was no time to add an explanation.
Because there was someone who intervened.
“that’s right! It’s because of me.”
“…!”
“I said let’s go first. It’s not Kim Rae-bin’s fault!”
Cha Yu-jin spoke quite vigorously, but she herself looked like she was about to cry.
Kim Rae-bin let out a hoarse voice.
“Oh no! MT was planned together with… …Now, the place is also me… .”
“Think about it later.”
I cut him off.
“Think about it later and see Grandma now.”
“….”
Kim Rae-bin barely nodded.
You shouldn’t make me think about it now. this is correct
empirically.
Soon the car’s navigation system stopped giving guidance.
“let’s go.”
“…yes.”
So, Kim Rae-bin stumbled and got out of the car and headed to the hospital.
The rest followed as far as they could accompany them.
It meant sitting on a waiting chair by the hallway of the hospital room and waiting for Kim Rae-bin to come out.
“….”
“Oh, my mother….”
In front of the hospital room, people who seemed to be relatives and medical staff came and went, but of course we pretended not to know or talked to each other and sat together.
Fortunately, the atmosphere… It didn’t seem too late.
I don’t know if I can call this fortunate.
It was around the time that the twilight sun was shining outside the window.
“It’s Moondae.”
“….”
“Park Moon-dae, why don’t you go to the car and lie down?”
“It’s not me, it’s Ryu Chung-woo…My brother will go.”
Does it make sense that the person who didn’t sleep all morning and drove was still awake.
It was moral for him to go to bed.
However, Liu Chengwu shook his head.
“I’m not that tired.”
“yes. So do i.”
“….”
The short conversation ended there. The members no longer talked about taking a break and waited more quietly.
After a while, Kim Rae-bin staggered out with a pale face and conveyed the situation.
“Rabin.”
“are you okay?”
“Yes yes…. Talking to Grandma… You are sleeping now… .”
It means that the hurdle has been passed.
‘under.’
Ironically, it seems that the tension in the whole body is getting out of the way.
Kim Rae-bin… Because it means it’s not too late.
However, I was able to guess from Kim Rae-bin’s expression and nuance.
It’s not a reassuring face.
‘…There will continue to be hardships in the future.’
I thought it might be the worst vacation for Kim Rae-bin.
* * *
The members who had a home to return to after telling the story to the company people who arrived a little late went home.
It was because Kim Rae-bin’s older sister, who came out of the hospital room belatedly, gently recommended him.
– Thank you very much for taking me there, Rabin.
-no. It’s only natural… .
-I heard you are on vacation. Thank you for spending a precious day… . I hope you are safe on your way back.
It was a reasonable remark because he must have felt sorry and he couldn’t have been in a situation where he could care about so many outsiders.
It was a great act of loyalty for these guys, who only have time to spend with their families once or twice a year, to accompany them this far.
However, Cha Yoo-jin firmly refused, saying that he was going to the dorm anyway.
– It’s okay, I can’t go over there! Here you are.
– Eugene… .
Thanks to my previous agency life, I was quite familiar with Kim Rae-bin’s family, but this was an atmosphere where I was accepted anyway.
But I can’t just leave Cha Yoo-jin behind… There was no
‘This guy isn’t the type to take care of someone completely.’
If not, Kim Rae-bin’s older sister could have taken care of him.
Besides, isn’t it too funny that only one of the two guys who would be in the same dorm would stay here, even if the older one is missing?
So I decided to stay too.
– I’m fine too. I was thinking of staying at the dorm on vacation anyway.
And after a few requests and relief, we moved to Kim Rae-bin’s home at the insistence of Kim Rae-bin’s older sister and grandfather.
And in the process, through a conversation with Kim Rae-bin’s older sister, I was able to hear an appropriate explanation of the situation.
– He said he would watch the situation for a few more days and go into surgery when conditions permit….
-…It’s not very likely.
-But rather than suddenly hearing something like this time… I think it would be better for Rabin to prepare his mind in advance.
I couldn’t do the crazy thing of asking what kind of disease it was.
Just going back and forth and listening to the conversations of relatives seemed like some sort of pituitary problem.
And after coming home, Kim Rae-bin, who was relieved of his tension, cried and said this.
“I found it when I was hospitalized last time…I work in Seoul, but he told me not to talk about it because he didn’t want to bother me… .”
“….”
“I didn’t even know that…I don’t even care and I feel like an idiot.”
“no! You are not stupid.”
“No, I was stupid! Oh today… I couldn’t even come to my senses and couldn’t do it properly… .”
“You did good enough.”
I cut Kim Raebin off.
“You did well to stay calm. You met your grandmother and did everything. No one is good at this kind of thing.”
“….”
Kim Rae-bin shrugged.
And I… I felt a strange feeling that my words worked.
‘that’s right.’
What party can be good at this kind of thing.
This is good enough.
I got up, opened the refrigerator, and took out an ionized drink, as Kim Rae-bin’s older sister gave permission in advance.
And after confirming that he was drinking by handing it to the guy who was obviously lacking in hydration, he said slowly.
“In the car…Sorry for pushing. great job.”
“Oh no…! Thanks to you, I was able to come on time… .”
Actually, it wouldn’t have happened to me to worry about later, but it must be a psychological problem.
And I realized that this psychological problem would continue.
‘…No matter how things turn out, it’s difficult.’
Even the conversation that this guy will have with the company after the vacation.
“Eat something delicious, Raebin Kim. Deliver!”
“Ship delivery…I’m going to do it.”
“okay. make it!”
Kim Rae-bin, who regained his usual tone by talking back to Cha Yu-jin, barely ordered food, but did not eat much.
The vacation passed while maintaining the usual atmosphere and waiting for the emergency call from the hospital.
and…The difficult moment has come.
* * *
Morning on the last day of vacation.
“They say that grandma is having an operation.”
Kim Rae-bin received a call from his sister in the morning and said quite calmly. Even though I was holding my smartphone upside down.
“Tell me while you eat.”
“This is Kim Rae-bin’s seat!”
“I know, this is our house! …yes! She says her condition has improved and she can undergo surgery!”
It meant there was a chance of recovery.
But again… It also meant that there was a greater chance that the operation would not be successful.
I don’t know.
Should I hit the candle or chime in with the guy who is trying to think hopefully?
So I brought out a practical problem instead.
The ‘difficult’ problem that I thought about from the first day of vacation.
“Are you planning on taking care of me?”
“yes…?”
“You know, the vacation ends for today.”
I put the spoon in the bowl.
“I have to return sometime tomorrow morning.”
“…!!”
“Is it okay if I go back to Seoul…You should think about it.”
…If you return to your activities and are in Seoul, you may not be able to stay on your deathbed if the progress of your grandmother’s surgery suddenly deteriorates.
I remembered the conversation I had with Kim Rae-bin when my grandmother collapsed for the first time at the beginning of my debut.
-In that case… While I was filming during the performance… Is it right to stop and go? But then… It sounds like you lack professional skills.
Is it family or work?
It’s that damned-alternative moment.
It’s not just a moment, but thinking about the whole 4 weeks to see the progress of the surgery.
‘The situation is like garbage.’
Of course, it was like that then, but what to say has been decided.
“I’ll tell you in advance, but it’s okay if you don’t come back for a while. It’s all about living well, but there’s no need to suffer.”
“…that’s right. are you okay!”
“Don’t worry, the company’s persuasion will come together.”
Cha Yoo-jin seems to know how to shoot support. You’ve been good at grasping the atmosphere these past few days.
And in fact, at this point, I thought Raebin Kim would close his eyes tightly and shout ‘I’m really sorry, but I’ll do it’.
But no.
“that…It would be painful to do so… ….”
“…!”
“It’s an important full-length album, but I haven’t finished a single song yet…A title is also in the works… .”
Of course, Kim Rae-bin also had a dream and a sense of responsibility.
“The music video, the choreography, the stage… Oh, I can’t contribute anything.”
Raebin Kim was even a member in charge of producing. So, it was also the musicality itself of the group called Testa.
Kim Rae-bin was quick to realize that if he completely fell in, the group identity would be damaged.
“If Grandma doesn’t die and recovers…It’s not what I did, that’s what I wanted.”
“Yes, I understand.”
I stopped talking to him.
That’s right. If Grandma recovers without any problems, Kim Rae-bin might regret that he rested for nothing.
And you will be disillusioned with yourself who regret it.
‘…Am I biased?’
I was a bit mistaken because it overlapped too much with my past situation.
I tapped the table with my fingers.
‘The best thing to do is to delay the release of the album for a month or two.’
But this troubled me.
If this happens, the tour schedule may be distorted, and then there may be a problem with clearing abnormal conditions.
‘I’ll turn around.’
It was then.
“Do both!”
“…!!”
Cha Yoo-jin shouted.
“We have a lot of good ways! phone and… mother.”
“Do it in english.”
[right! I speak English, right?]
Yujin Cha knocked on the table with her eyes shining.
[It’s an era where you can have mail, video calls, and even video chat! Raebin Kim tells me to work on a song here! And we prepare other elements!]
“…!”
Surprisingly reasonable. I immediately opened my mouth.
“Cha Yoo-jin told me to work from home remotely while working on a song here.”
“Are you working from home?”
“It sounds good to me.”
As expected, Kim Rae-bin’s complexion instantly improved.
“Even I hear it! Then, other than the song… .”
I clasped my hands together.
The hair started to roll smoothly within a few days.
“Don’t do this. The choreography will make two versions just in case. The version without you.”
“yes??”
“great!”
“And in the same way, for filming, we select our individual cuts and groups, and set the four individual shooting dates separately as much as possible.”
“Oh!”
“As much as possible, I’m putting back the time you joined, and I’m also completing a version in case you couldn’t join.”
Kim Rae-bin opened his mouth wide.
“…I’m sorry.”
“What are you sorry about? It’s just that the later you join, the harder it gets for you alone.”
I asked.
“Are you going to do it anyway?”
“…yes!”
good.
Kim Rae-bin nodded eagerly.
Still, he looked quite courageous, and soon began rubbing his eyes.
There must have been something uplifting for various reasons.
“Okay, let’s do as much as we can.”
“yes….”
I added a comment.
“And you can quit halfway if it doesn’t work.”
“That’s right! It’s not Kim Rae-bin’s fault.”
That’s right.
That’s how the 4 weeks of trying to catch both work and family rabbits began.
