Episode 1442. What should I do? (2)
The night was very dark and heavy.
At first, even though they had created a place to rest, many people were anxious that the Maninbang might attack again at any time. However, even this had its limits, and in the end, most of them fell asleep, unable to overcome the fatigue that was eating away at their bodies.
Those who made the desperate flight from Chengdu to here and those who ran with all their might from Nanjing all fell into a deep sleep.
However, Tang Xiaobo could not fall asleep easily.
The sound of insects and the breathing of those who had fallen asleep tickled her ears. Out of some sense of anxiety, I glanced around and saw the backs of those standing guard. She repeated as if to console herself.
It’s okay now.
Even if that Maninbang attacks again, the Tang family warriors and that volcano are here together. So now you will never have to experience such a terrible thing again.
However, the anxiety that has already settled deeply in my heart does not easily go away.
Now… what happens?
It was just a vague question.
She has never been out of Dhangata all her life. It’s not just her. Most women born into Tang families are in the same situation as her.
Before she leaves the Tang family and becomes a member of another family, the only land she can tread on is the Tang family, and at most she can reach the level of a saint. But now there is no party to return to them.
Although he said something interesting, my heart sank and I felt uncomfortable just thinking about the party no longer existing.
‘Elder.’
Suddenly, I vaguely remembered the image of people outside the party shouting for me to hurry up and go.
But then I saw someone getting up.
‘huh? Who…’
The person who got up walked slowly and silently and left the place where people were gathered. Those who had been standing guard tightly guarding the surrounding area reflexively blocked him, but then retreated after seeing his face.
In the dim light of the campfire, I could see his face. A star name appeared in Tang Xiaobo’s mind.
‘Hwasan Sword Association.’
After catching a glimpse of the sentries, he quickly walked away, enveloped in the darkness that had fallen on the field. The party bureau looked at the Huashan Sword Association and others in silence.
The sound of grasshoppers echoed quietly in the wide field.
Tanggunak, who was sitting in a reed field surrounded by high mountains, suddenly grabbed a reed growing next to him.
Ttuduk.
He simply grabbed the broken reed and flicked it away with a light movement of his wrist. The reed that flew away with a booming sound pierced through the rock in front and got stuck.
Then, an admiring voice came from somewhere.
“and.”
When Tanggunak turned around, Cheongmyeong approached him with a grin.
“That could be cool.”
Cheongmyeong came through the reeds and gestured towards Tanggunak’s side.
“Can I sit down?”
Tang Junyu looked at Qingming with a complex and strange face.
“Well, if you really want to be alone, I can go back.”
“⋯⋯No.”
Tanggunak shook his head and pointed next to me. Then Cheongmyeong sat down on the spot. Then, without saying a word, he raised his head and looked at the sky.
Neither Cheongmyeong nor Tanggunak opened their mouths. They just stare at what they can see with their eyes. Maybe they are sitting in the same place, but what they are looking at is different.
After a fairly long silence, Tanggunak slowly opened his mouth.
“Why aren’t you talking?”
“I didn’t come because I had anything to say. “I just came.”
Tanggunak let out a small laugh.
“You will die someday because of that foolishness.”
“Isn’t it strange?”
“What do you mean?”
“In the past, I lived my life being told to please pay attention to others. But now people keep telling me to stop being so rude.”
“⋯⋯.”
“I don’t feel like anything has changed. Why is that?”
“Well… I don’t know. “Probably one of the two.”
Cheongmyeong looked at Tanggunak. He had his back on the floor and his head was hanging down.
“Either you have changed or the world has changed.”
“Which one do you think it is?”
“I guess you have changed. No, it’s true that you have changed. “You are a different person now than when I first saw you.”
Cheongmyeong made a groaning sound.
“They say that when people change, they die.”
“It’s okay because I’m already half dead. “It’s good to be alive.”
This wasn’t a joke.
I poured everything I could into it, but even so, I thought there was less than half a chance that Cheongmyeong would survive. Even if he survived, he thought it would be impossible to recover to the same level of inaction as before.
But now Cheongmyeong is calmly joking next to him. It was something that could not be understood with the common sense of Tang military music.
“Are you feeling okay?”
“Do you feel like you’re going to die?”
“⋯⋯It’s good to be honest.”
“It’s one of my many strengths!”
“Isn’t that the only advantage?”
“You seem to have a good reputation among your close friends.”
Tang Gunak chuckled.
right. It is one of the many advantages. When he is with Cheongmyeong, he becomes cheerful without realizing it. Perhaps that is also an indispensable advantage of Cheongmyeong.
Tanggunak looked up at the sky again. Countless stars seemed to be pouring down, looking down at him.
“Hwasan Sword Association. “What do you think when you see that star?”
“Um…”
Cheongmyeong looked slightly worried and then smiled.
“I don’t think anything.”
Normally, this would be an answer that would be met with disapproval, but Tanggunak only showed a slightly bitter expression. Then he spoke slowly.
“I’ve thought about that while looking at that star for a long time. If I can shake off memorization like the stars that fill the sky, I can become the best in the world. In this way, the Tang family will become the best in the world.”
“⋯⋯You were born as the head of a family.”
No, but I think I’ve heard something similar… Are all party bastards like this?
“But do you know what that star looks like to me now?”
“⋯⋯Well?”
“I can see it with my eyes.”
“eye?”
Tang Gunak nodded.
“The eyes of my ancestors looking down on me.”
For a moment, Cheongmyeong kept his mouth shut. This is because I felt a pressure so heavy that it was difficult to express it in the words of Tanggunak.
Tanggunak slowly lowered his head. The moment the stars that decorated the sky disappeared from view, what caught his eye was the darkness that had descended on the entire world.
“The party family will decline.”
“⋯⋯.”
“No matter how hard you try, you won’t be able to stop it. Because what is lost cannot be brought back.”
“Matriarch.”
“No matter how much I think about it, I don’t know.”
“⋯⋯.”
“What should I do now?”
Cheongmyeong could not easily offer words of comfort.
The gloom that Tanggunak is feeling right now is probably beyond his imagination. It is not the end that Dangata was burned and it was impossible to return to Sacheon.
I lost my memorization and I lost my poison.
This is by no means something that can be repaired in a short period of time. Perhaps we will never again be able to reach the heights that the original party reached.
Since Tang Jia lost his poison and memorization, this would not be much different from Hwasan losing his sword. Can a volcano without a sword be called a sword? If it is Cheongmyeong, can it be said positively that the volcano that prevented it from using its sword is also a volcano?
Therefore, no one could answer Tanggunak’s questions for him.
“I heard what happened in Chengdu. “They say that old man Shinsu set fire to the party house and drove out the Gasols.”
‘Jopyeong…’
Cheongmyeong quietly closed his eyes, repeating the name in his mind.
The wrinkled face of Tang Jo-pyeong and the face of Tang Jo-pyeong as a child came to mind at the same time. How will Tang Jopyeong be remembered by Qingming?
“That’s not like him. But at the same time, it’s like him.”
“⋯⋯I see.”
“Thanks to the elders, the party family has survived. Even if I thank you a thousand times, it wouldn’t be enough. By the way, Hwasan Sword Association.”
Tang Kunyak suddenly turned his head and stared at Qingming. There was red around Tang Gunak’s eyes.
“Is it because I am weak that I feel resentful of such an elderly person? Or is it because they are evil?”
“⋯⋯Matriarch.”
Tanggunak’s eyes turn a little more red.
Cheongmyeong became a little more miserable. I have never seen it. This is what Tanggunak looks like.
Even if the moment comes when the head is cut off, the party music will be proud.
But his appearance now was far from dignified. He was nothing more than a man weighed down by weight and burden, not the poisonous king Tanggunak, the head of the Sacheondang family.
A deep sigh escaped Cheongmyeong’s mouth.
It’s not strange. There is no one in the world who is strong. There are only people who grit their teeth and pretend to be strong. Just like Cheongmyeong did in the past.
“I know. People are more precious than anything else. I don’t dare compare things like poison or memorization to people. The old man was not wrong. “Even if it was me who was there, the choice wouldn’t have been different in the end.”
The voice of Tanggunak was deeply subdued. As if submerged in water. No, as if it was submerged in something heavier than that.
“But… I don’t know. “Even though I know it’s right, I keep thinking that way.”
Cheongmyeong seemed to know what Tanggunak had to say.
“⋯⋯It would be better if I had protected the family, if I had protected the foundation of the party family no matter what sacrifice I had to make⋯⋯.”
Surely it might have been a little easier if that had been the case.
Although the number may have decreased, the party will still be the party. If everything that the Tang family has achieved over generations remains the same, one day the Tang family will be able to regain its original form, the loser of Sichuan.
“Isn’t it funny?”
Tang Gunak’s face distorted.
“⋯⋯Matriarch.”
“I disgust myself.”
Tang Gunak’s hands were shaking slightly.
“That’s it… I am weighing that cold lump of iron, which is nothing, compared to a human life. “I keep thinking that it wouldn’t have mattered if some of them died to protect them.”
As much as my hands were shaking, my voice was also shaking badly. It’s like someone is strangling, squeezing, and twisting my neck.
“I keep thinking that if I had done that, the pain would have been more extreme, but I might have been in a better situation in the future!”
Tang Gunak covered his face with his hands. A voice with trembling fingers came out.
“I am so… so disgusted by that.”
Cheongmyeong turned his head away. It’s not because I don’t want to see it. Because it was also difficult for him to calm down.
The future you firmly believed in collapses, you lose what you thought was everything, and you are crushed by a huge weight that you cannot bear.
‘You probably did the same.’
Probably so.
The young swordsmen of Hwasan who realized that none of their ancestors, who had waited and waited for them, could return, and the disciples of Hwasan who watched with tears of blood as Hwasan burned, which they had tried to protect at all costs, are now like Tang military evil. It must have been.
Who can dare to comfort someone so easily? Who can fully understand that feeling?
“Hey, Hwasan Sword Association.”
“⋯⋯Yes.”
“What should I do?”
Tang Junak looked at Qingming. Cheongmyeong met his two wet eyes and immediately raised his gaze to the sky. The star-filled sky overlapped with the sky he had seen one day.
The sky was probably no different from the sky that overlooked Shaanxi on the day the volcano burned.
That’s why Cheongmyeong had to speak.
What someone was trying to convey. What he had to say. The words of the person who passed away without being able to convey them.
